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Deshi Jokes - PAGE 1

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Ant jokes
Amin,Arbab
AAMIN@students.uwsuper.edu

Three ants were trying to cross the India and Pakistan border one night, when all hell broke loose. India and Pakistan started a battle in the border, and to make matters worse, it started raining. Gun shots were being
fired, lightning's flashing and bombs exploding every where. The ants were following each other in a line, when the one in front said, "I've got two ants behind me, and nobody in front of me". The ant in the middle said,"I've got one ant in front of me, and one behind", and the third ant, who was the last one in the line, said that "I've got two ants in front and two behind me".

Quetion: how could that third ant have two in front of him, and two behind

Blonde Joke 2
u90sh <u90sh@abdn.ac.uk>
A blonde goes into a electronics shop in search of a new TV. She asks the assistant, "I would like to buy this TV." The assistant answers, "We don't sell to blondes." The blonde walks out angrily. She went home and dyed her hair brown and went back to the shop.She asks the assistant, "I would like to buy this TV."
The assistant answers, "We don't sell to blondes." She walks out again feeling depressed. She went home and this time, shaved off all her hair and went back to the shop. She asks the assistant, "I would like to buy this TV." The assistant answers, "We don't sell to blondes." The blonde gives up and says, "I dyed my hair brown, then shaved off all my hair, how can you still tell I'm a blonde?!" The assistant answers, "This is a microwave, not a TV."

Blonde Jokes - u90sh <u90sh@abdn.ac.uk>

3 blondes were stuck on an island and couldn't get back on land. A magical fairy appeared and granted them each a wish.

The first blonde wants to be very smart...WHOOSH... the fairy turns her into a redhead...... she builds a boat and rows back to the other side.

The 2nd blonde wants to be even smarter...WHOOSH.... the fairy turns her into a brunette....she swims back to land.

The 3rd blonde wanted to be the smartest...WHOOSH.... the fairy turns her into a man and he walked back across the bridge.

PS. having told this joke, men are not (always) smarter than women!!!

All Change Here!
Collected By: Md. Mashud Karim
Yokohama, Japan
A boy and his father, who were visiting from a remote village, were at Motijheel commercial area. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again. (elevator doors)

The boy asked his father, "What is this, Father?"
The father responded, "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life. I don't know what it is!"

While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed, an old lady in a wheelchair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened, and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed, and the boy and his father watched small circles of lights with numbers above the walls light up. They continued to watch the circles light up in the reverse direction. The walls opened up again
and a beautiful young lady stepped out.

The father said to his son, "Quick, go get your mother!"

Slap Tap 72!
From: Pulak
Uttara, Dhaka, Bangladesh
goodwill@bdlink.com

There was these two boys quarreling and arguing among each other. Suddenly they started to fight. Seeing them, a Third boy came rushing at the spot to stop their fight. Coming close to them, the third boy heard the first boy say to the second boy:

First Boy    : " One tight slap and I will take out your all 72 teeth".
The third boy was stunned and asked the First boy:
Third Boy    : "Hey man! What the hell are you tacking about? Where in the world
                     did you find a person with seventy two teeth?"
First Boy     : Yeah, I know that, you were going to interfere in our matter, that's why, I have included yours as well."

Love and Marriage
Submitted by: Monojir Ali From: Paterson, New Jersey, USA
ali3897@yahoo.com

Mr. and Mrs. Uddin were invited to their friend's home for dinner. Asad, the host, preceded every request to his wife by endearing terms, calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, Pumpkin, etc.

Mrs. Uddin looked at Asad and remarked, "That is really nice. After all these years that you have been married, you keep calling your wife those pet names. That is so lovely, I wish your friend was to call me like that"

Asad hung his head and whispered, "Babi, to tell you the truth, I forgot her name three years ago."

Baby became imminent
. Time: During the recent cricket match in Bangladesh.
Author unknown. Submitted by Sayeed

      As the birth of the baby became imminent the father ( Mr. Jamal ) telephoned the hospital. Unfortunately, he got through to the Bangladesh Cricket Control Board by mistake.

     ' Has anything happened?' he asked.

     Jamal almost puzzled when the voice at the end of the other line replied, ' Oh, yes they are all out... the last two were ducks!'

Looking for wife
By: TASMIN BEGUM

   Rahim is almost 29 years old, his friends have already gotten married, and Rahim just dates and dates. Finally a friend asks him, "What's the matter, are you looking for the perfect woman? Are you that particular? Can't you find anyone who suits you?"

   "No," Rahim replies. "I meet many nice girls, but as soon as I bring them home to meet my parents, my Mother doesn't like them. So I keep on looking!"

"Listen," his friend suggests, "Why don't you find a girl who's just like your dear old Mother?"

Many weeks go by and again Rahim and his friend get together. "So Rahim. Did you find the perfect girl yet. One that's just like your Mother?"

Rahim shrugs his shoulders, "Yes I found one just like Mom. My mother loved her, they became fast friends." "So are you and this girl engaged, yet?"

"I'm afraid not, my Father can't stand her!"

Joke : Train Tickets
Location: Chittagong rail station to Dhaka rail station.

     Three engineers and three accountants were traveling by train to a conference. At the station, the three accountants each bought tickets and watched as the three engineers bought only one ticket.

     "How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?" asked an accountant. "Watch and you'll see", answered an engineer.

    They all boarded the train. The accountants took their respective seats, but the three engineers all jammed into a rest room and closed the door behind them. Shortly after the train departed, the train conductor came around collecting tickets. He knocked on the restroom door and said, "Ticket, please". The door opened just a crack and a single arm emerged with a ticket in hand. The conductor took it and moved on.

    The accountants saw this and agreed it was a quite clever idea. So, after the conference, the accountants decide to copy the engineers on the return trip and save some money (being clever with money, and all that).

    When they got to the station, they bought a single ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the engineers didn't buy a ticket at all. "How are you going to ride without a ticket"? said one perplexed accountant. "Watch and you'll see", answered an engineer.

    When they boarded the train, the three accountants jammed into a restroom and the three engineers jammed into another one nearby. The train departed.

    Shortly afterward, one of the engineers left his restroom and walked over to the restroom where the accountants were hiding.

    He knocked on the door and said, "Ticket, please".

Author :   Unknown,
Submitted by : Sayeed on Oct 12, 2000
Huntington Beach, California, USA

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